The adventures and trials of a 21-year-old girl fresh out of a long-term relationship. Read on for hilarity, conflicting emotions, and a search for self.

28th April 2013



I may be a tab inebriated, but I’m sober enough to know that one boy and his little gang following me around the bar (including waiting outside when I went to the bathroom) is not okay, especially when I ask them to leave me alone. My older brother was at the bar so I said I was tired and left. I hate not feeling safe in public spaces. Assholes.

Tagged: nights outstupid boysnot a good time

27th April 2013

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I have been a VERY BAG BLOGGER over the past few months… as I haven’t posted anything of substance since December. 
I am so sorry I was gone for so long! I could say I’ve been busy and it would be true, but it would be more accurate to say that I’ve just been lazy. But on the bright side… there’s a decent bit to catch up on. Europe, my new job, my 21st birthday, and of course I’ve got both hot and hilarious hook-up stories. The next few weeks  should be filled with a good number of posts.
Did you miss me?

Tagged: I'm the worstI missed you allSorryyyyyyyyyyyy

7th January 2013



I have so much to post about… my trip to Europe, New Year’s, and starting my new job… but I’m sick and all I can really think about doing is drinking tea and watching Private Practice. I feel terrible for being so neglectful of the blog but I can’t help that my body hates me. Soon, okay? I’m so sorry everyone :(

I hope 2013 is going well for you all so far <3 

Tagged: sicksicksicksickbleeeeerg

25th December 2012


Merry Christmas!

Hello Tumblr, I’ve missed you! I got back home from my European adventure on the 23rd and then drove four hours north to visit family for Christmas so I haven’t been able to post since getting back. Expect a post about my trip after the holidays! I’m going to go open presents now :) have a lovely day everyone!

9th December 2012

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Exam season

Hey everyone, sorry I haven’t been posting much! I’m in the middle of university exams so I haven’t been doing much other than studying and hanging out with the roomies. That might change tomorrow though…

Yesterday, I had two exams. I finished my second one at 9 pm so I went home and consumed copious amounts of wine with the roomies. I was exhausted and passed out shortly after 1 pm. Checked my phone when I woke up this morning and saw I had a text from Jake at 2:45 saying “Hey, what’s up?” and then again at 3:20 saying “Wake up lol.” Evidently, I didn’t wake up haha. We were texting for a bit and catching up this morning. We don’t text as often as we used to so it’s normal for us to only text like once a week now. He’s working nights this week so I said I might be able to see him after my exam tomorrow (2-5 pm) if I wasn’t tired. Look at me, being all nonchalant… ish haha. 

Additionally, holy crap I leave for Paris in less than a week. I am beyond excited!!! Can’t wait to recount my adventures abroad to you all when I get back!

Tagged: Single Girlboystravel

1st December 2012


mattyvlentine said: Your dick piercing story was rather entertaining ^.^

Haha I’m glad you found it entertaining. Probably some of the weirdest sex I’ve had, but it’s kind of funny to look back on it now and think, “Wow, that was actually pretty terrible!” hahaha!

30th November 2012

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dear-tammyy said: Hi, Melanie. I've been reading your posts for awhile. I love that you're happy and enjoying life. I graduated from high school a few months ago. & like you, I went through a couple of relationships.. which were close together. The current guy i'm with is probably the sweetest guy i've been with. But because of previous relationships, it feels like I lost myself and not being able to grasp who I am. I don't want to leave & hurt my boyfriend, he does make me happy.. but I feel empty at times.

Hi there! Ooh, that’s a tough situation. I’m no expert, but I think you should talk to your boyfriend about this. If he’s as sweet as you say he is, he probably really cares about you and wants you to be happy. It’s tricky when you need some space to reconnect with yourself but you also don’t want to miss the opportunity to be with a great guy. 
Regardless of whether you stay with him or if you break up, you need to find something that helps fill that emptiness you feel inside. Personally, writing this blog, playing a bunch of video games, volunteering, and making new friends has helped me to feel more like myself than I have for what feels like years. Maybe ask yourself, “If I wasn’t in a relationship, what would I want to be doing with my life right now?” or “What have I always wanted to do but never did?”
It’s not impossible for you to rediscover yourself while in a relationship, but you’re the only one who can decide if you can. It can be difficult to be considerate of someone else, particularly a significant other, when you’re trying to focus on personal discovery and growth. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my relationships and the past five months of singledom, it’s that sometimes you have to put yourself first. I was too selfless for too long and it made me forget what I wanted and who I was.
Like I said, you’re the only one who knows what’s right for you and you’re the only one who can find those certain things that make you feel like YOU. If you need someone to talk to along the way as you figure all of this out, you can send me a message any time. I hope things work out for you! <3

(Also, I’m publishing this because I thought it might be relevant to some readers who might find themselves in a similar situation. If you’d like me to take it down/keep this private, just send me a message and I’ll delete it right away) 

30th November 2012

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Dick Piercing

Yeah, I had to title this post like that. Hung out with the neighbour boys while we got ready for our respective nights out. Went out to the bar with Karen and bumped into a cute, tall guy at coat check. Karen and I went off and danced for a while and then we bumped into him on the dance floor. Danced with him for a few songs, some light flirting, and then he bought me a drink and we sat down to chat. Found out his name was Toby, he’s from Nigeria, and his next tattoo is going to be a Hogwarts crest. He currently has a Hakuna Matata one and is a self-professed Disney nerd. We bonded over tons of nerdy stuff, made out a little, and found Karen and headed home with her. 

The chemistry kind of fizzled when we got back to my place but I was like, “Meh, I want sex.” So we’re making out, fooling around, and then I get his pants off and he has a dick piercing. I had no idea those even existed. It was like at the bottom of the shaft, top of the balls. He was a decent size, but as he was the first black guy I’ve ever done, I was expecting like an elephant trunk or something haha. Probably good that it wasn’t excessively huge. So we go at it for a bit and man, he was not good. I faked an orgasm (yes, I will do that to get out of bad sex) and said I had to be up early and that I don’t sleep well with people in my bed (not true), but he kind of kept going. I literally had to push him up, which made me super uncomfortable because I’ve never had a guy be kind of forceful in a way that wasn’t fun for me. He was really nice and I don’t think he meant for it to seem like he was pushing things, but I set him straight right away about the “no-means-no” thing. He apologized and seemed genuinely sorry, but I still wanted him out. Chemistry had died, I was tired, and I didn’t like the way he had been even if it wasn’t intentional. 

Sorry for the crappy post but I’m annoyed and sleepy. Goodnight, tumblr! May your sexytimes be better than mine were tonight.

Tagged: Single Girlhookupsnights outsex

28th November 2012


Phone Number Fail

Hey everyone! So I spent Friday night catching up with some of my friends from first year at a 90’s themed kegger. I wore a denim skirt, a graphic tee, a flannel shirt, and converse… It made me feel super nostalgic haha! I met a guy at the party named Cameron. We really hit it off and were hanging out for something like two hours. Tall, handsome, nerdy, slightly older… pretty much my ideal guy. I considered taking him back to my place, but 1) he was staying at the host’s place because he lives a half hour away and had to drive her to a practice in the morning and 2) I thought that there might be potential for something beyond a hookup so I didn’t want him to file me into the “hookup only” category.

Totally screwed up though because when I got his number, I missed a digit somewhere when I was typing it into my phone and now I have no idea what his actual number is. I didn’t get his last name either so Facebook hasn’t been helpful. Urg! Of course the first guy that I feel I have a real, healthy connection with is now unreachable. Oh well. We had a fun time and I guess that’s just a lesson for next time… always text them while you’re still in their presence to make sure you have the right number. D’oh.

Tagged: Single Girlboyspartyfail

23rd November 2012

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Following you!

Hey everyone! You might have noticed that someone named singlewithswagger2 is now following you. Don’t worry, it’s me! When I made this blog, I made it an ‘additional blog’ and I didn’t realize that meant that I couldn’t follow people on it. I want to keep the SWS blog separate from my primary one so this was the solution I came up with. I love getting messages from all of you—some of your stories could definitely rival mine—and last month I decided that I needed more of you awesome people in my life. I finally added everyone on that account… it’s not like there are thousands of you, but I would get distracted by your blogs and then forget that I was in the middle of following everyone. Oops. Sorry if I took a while to get to you!

You don’t need to worry about following the other blog, I won’t be posting anything over there. All of my (mis?)adventures will still be posted right here! Just wanted to clear up any confusion in case you didn’t read the explanation on that blog. 

Hope you all have a swaggerific weekend! I’m off to a 90’s themed kegger tonight and then tomorrow night, Karen and I are having a video game night with the neighbour boys we recently befriended. It’s gonna be a good time :)

PS - When you send me messages, it’d be great if you could let me know whether you want it published or if you want to keep it private.  I love hearing your feedback and stories but I’m never sure if you guys would like them posted on the blog so I just make them private. :)

Tagged: Single GirlI love you allsecondary blog